lifewithomg

A wise woman once told me that you should be able to look back on your life and proudly say, ” I’m not the same person I was a year ago.” Oh how I yearned to be able to believe that to be a possibility! Now, even looking back on the previous months, I can’t believe how much I’ve changed in maturity and spiritually. When I was turning 21, everyone kept asking if I was going to go out to celebrate.  Several recommended that I take a shot at midnight or simply buy my first “adult drink”. That’s not really my style. No, if I were to drink, I wouldn’t do it out of pressure or what others recommend I do. So, what did I do? Well, let me tell you a story…

I have a problem. I love stuff. Preferably cool stuff. (Probably why my room is always a mess, or as I like to say, “it’s just being remodeled.”) It was no surprise that when my best friend announced she was going to Israel, I didn’t even have to tell her to bring me back something because she already knew. I love the story in John where Jesus heals a blind man with mud. (Haven’t read it? Catch up here.) I immediately told her to bring me back some mud in a jar, because the Greatest Of All Time most likely walked on those same grounds. She faithfully delivered and brought back a mud mask that was to be used for your arms and legs. The night before the 21st Annual OMG Day (my birthday), I smothered that mud ALL over my limbs. I looked like I was trying to paint my legs after a muddy rainstorm! It was awesome. I obviously had way too much fun.

Minutes away from midnight, I sat there, a muddy mess, patiently waiting for the “big moment.” I started to think, what greater way to start a new year of my life than to thank the One who gave it to me? I immediately closed my eyes and opened my heart. I began to thank God for my life. I thanked Him for my family and friends for supporting me. I thanked Him for continuing to give me second, third and tenth chances, when I truly didn’t deserve any. I thanked Him for His grace, patience, and love. Even when I’ve rejected Him, He’s never rejected me. He never turns away from me, even when I feel like I can’t go on.

I personally feel as though God has called me to be something greater than I could think or imagine. Something that I certainly can’t accomplish without Him guiding me every step of the way. That being said, consuming alcohol to celebrate another year of my life isn’t what I felt to be the wisest decision. If you disagree, that’s fine. But the tugging on my heart trumps your opinions to my actions. I proudly spent the day with some powerful women I call family, and the evening with some powerful people I call brothers and sisters in Christ. They didn’t pressure me to be someone I’m not, and I am forever grateful for our friendships.

It’s true that the choices we make shape who we are in the future. Make no mistake, I AM NOT PERFECT. I have made huge mistakes. I’ve hurt close family members and lost some really great friends because of my actions. Unfortunately, I’m still facing consequences for said actions. But, I refuse to let my past define me. I’m fortunate enough to have a semi-private personal life, but that doesn’t mean I’m not being judged. I want to be flattered but I’m too confused. I’m not rich, I don’t have a lot of friends, and I don’t understand why contour is so popular. I’m different and kind of weird. I only eat the yellow starbursts, I don’t like condiments on my hot dogs, I prefer my movie popcorn slightly burnt, and I like the smell of birthday candles after they’ve been blown out.

The last 12 months have been intense. Friendships had fallen, my faith had been tested, and I lost so many battles that I stopped keeping track. As any other distraught person would do, I cried out to God. Like a baby. It went something like this: “WHY? When will it get better? Will I always be like this? Are you going to say something? Anything?!” Before I could get a response, I went to sleep. That morning, a dear friend of mine messaged me. Now, she lives out of town. We see and talk to each other maybe twice a year. She’s the type of friend that you really like, but rarely talk to. She said, “God hears us,” and sent me a picture of her Jesus Calling devotion for the day. It said this:

“I am leading you along a way that is uniquely right for you. The closer to Me you grow, the more fully you become your true self–the one I designed you to be…in My mysterious wisdom and ways, I enable you to follow this solitary path while staying in close contact with others.”

For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10

I lost it. I hadn’t told ANYONE how I was feeling. I didn’t want to think about it, let alone say it out loud. I couldn’t believe that God had used a distant friend to talk directly to ME! Even when I was too afraid to confess how I felt, He knew. He knew and placed the right person in my life for such a time as this.

Have you ever thought that maybe you were called to be different? Like you’re a yellow tulip in a field of red roses? You unashamedly like the banana flavored popsicles and will gladly eat them for the sake of your family’s taste buds! It’s okay to not be like everyone else. It’s okay to be set apart. God has placed a calling on all of our lives. No two people are the same! He made a masterpiece when He created you! He never makes mistakes.

People will always look at you a certain way because of the decisions you make. Don’t pay any attention to them! They will always be there. The calling on your life is far greater than Kimberly getting mad at you because you didn’t feel like going outside for a quick smoke, or even Mark thinking you’re a jerk because you’d rather drink water over getting drunk at a bar. No one said it would be easy. In fact, as you grow stronger in your faith, it’ll only get harder. But fear not! God will equip you with everything you need to overcome the battles you face. You are strong. You are royalty. You are a child of the One, true King.

Make your choice, but know that when you make the right one, it’s worth it. Only you can decide who you want to be and what kind of life you will live. Stand out. Be different and be proud of it! But above all, honor Christ in everything you do. After all, we’re just imperfect people living imperfect lives just trying to serve a perfect God. Be the best You that there is. There is no one else like you and don’t ever forget that!

Choosing Purity over Temporary Pleasure,

OMG

P.S. I’ll stick with water. Thanks though.